I cracked open the bottle, poured the beer into a tulip glass, and settled in for a long drinking sesh. The barrel aging is pretty apparent at first whiff. Kinda like how Bigfoot probably marks his territory, the aroma was pungent but mellowed after a few minutes in the glass. The beer is a bit hot at first, again, probably like Bigfoot marking his territory, and then smoothed out over time. The bottle itself is pretty neat and contains some old Sierra Nevada artwork for one of the first Bigfoot series labels. If you ever have the chance to grab a vertical flight (where someone has bottles from previous years and you taste all of them together), the Bigfoot Barleywine series, barrel aged or not, is one of the best beers for doing this. Whether Bigfoot exists or not, whether he eats Jack Link beef jerky or raw deer meat from a fresh kill, whether he is a friendly house pet like in Harry and the Hendersons or a hell beast with a murderous streak, these are questions for another time. The Barrel Aged Bigfoot Barleywine from Sierra Nevada crushes it. Its 11.6 percent ABV is as fierce and strong as Bigfoot’s dick. Drink this slowly and enjoy, unlike the real Bigfoot, this thing only comes once a year.
Evolution isn't perfect, Charles Darwin himself was once quoted as saying "there are some pretty weird ass animals out there. The Universe is fucked up." I agree Charles, I agree. One of these animals is the Panda Bear. Let's judge it on its merits:
Brief Bear Comparison:
This is a picture of a grizzly bear, it's fucking ferocious.
That snarling mouth just told a hiker to shut the hell up. No one wants to give this bear a cute and cuddly widdle hug. It'll rip your arms off and then lose interest and walk away BECAUSE IT"S A FUCKING GRIZZLY BEAR.
This is a picture of an assy-faced panda.
What the fuck even is this? This panda is like one of your friends who continually farts in group settings but always plays it coy, even though we know it's you. Actually, all pandas are like that. Constantly eating bamboo would wreck your GI system. Just wreck it. Do pandas care? Nope. They're too busy stuffing their damn faces with bamboo to notice they smell like a hoarder's bathroom.
Panda's don't eat humans, they're vegans?!?!?
Panda's are going extinct because they are just naturally prone to death
Panda's are the mascot of a super gross Trader Joe's cereal best known for cutting the roof of your mouth
Panda's are afraid of sneezes
Where does this leave us?
A couple salient points here. Pandas need our protection. They just die too easily. When they have kids they are so aloof about the whole thing it's like watching an episode of MTV's Teen Mom. Is the grizzly bear a fair example. Of course it fucking is. People are scared of bears. That's evolution, we fear what can harm us. Pandas just don't belong in the bear category, get it together you panda slobs.